Worthless Phrases and Lost Persons

Music: "Hello Old Friend" by Cream {RIP Dean}

Well another day on campus, and another day of fall that is exceedingly warm. 88 to be exact. Sposed to be pretty bad this weekend though. Cold. Not good for Homecoming. Ah well.

Couple quick things today. I hope I don't waste too much of your time like usual. But "I just wanna lay this out here, and get it out in the open." In recent history I have noticed the uprising of pointless phrases. I may use a few myself. But it's time we put a few to rest. A few that I hear in everyday life include "I'm not gonna lie...." and "Honestly,....." and "Let's just get this out in the open....". All of them can be done without in nearly every situation. I would say there are a fine few situations where they are somewhat appropriate. For example, if you're friend says to you, "Where did all of this semen come from?" then it would be appropriate for you to say (as the culprit ready to confess) "I'm not gonna lie, I started an orgy in your dormatory cell last evening after a few drinks at Simon's place. Things got a little pandimonious, and one thing lead to another, and apparently we forgot a couple of love stains when we were cleaning. My apologies." This opening phrase shows your friend off the bat that you could have easily lied about the evening before, but you didn't. Even still it is not a necessary part of the phrase. However it is quite inappropriate when with close friends to say something so trivial with one of these phrases in front of the statement. For example "I'm not going to lie, I am obsessed with the OC". Well chances are that you watch the damn program every week (or every night on DVD if you're so lucky)because the whole world stops for you and must run itself around you, because you demand that every public television on campus must be turned to the local FOX network or else heads are going to roll. And let's say somebody did want to watch something else and refused to meet the OC's demands, it would turn into some real big problem. And they would tell on you. By the end the crazed OC fanatics would have it framed in such a way that you are racist and should no longer be welcome in Marty's or wherever the devil these kids watch TV....Hmmm, well back to where I was before. Chances are, you watch this show every week with all of your closest friends. So there aren't too many people who need to be reminded and reassured that you are not lying about your feelings about the OC. Because we all know from our darkest nightmares that, heaven forbid, you will wake up one morning and realize "Oh my god! I think I don't like the OC anymore." (Or maybe if you're not so lucky and you will wake up in a heavy sweat and realize that you don't like Ted Koppel anymore either. We all know our good friend Homer wasn't so lucky.) At which point you will begin rationalizing the thought of cutting yourself until you just...pass out. So let us just forget about being reminding one another of our loyal feelings for a programme and enjoy your feelings in their purest sense. Nuff said.

I tried to make that brief, but it didn't happen. Oh well. Just a quick reminder, we are still missing Mitch's mobile phone. Mitch describes the phone as: "It says "Gay" (proper name, not adjective) on the display." Chris Sowa is still out on the loose as well. Both items were lost early Sunday morning (between 1:30 CDT and 2:30AM CDT) near the MPLS. Eagle establishment on Washington Ave in Minneapolis. Information regarding the whereabouts of the lost items will warrant handsome rewards. Thank you for your time. And Godspeed.